Dancing With The Devil and Don't Even Know It

Busting Addiction and Its Myths

In this article, we discuss how the subtle effects of early-stage addiction or alcoholism are difficult to spot and often denied, and how enabling happens with good intentions and bad results.

We cover the following topics:

1. The signs of early-stage addiction are so subtle, there is a high likelihood that loved ones will miss them, and therefore they will attribute troubling behaviour to a "normal" cause. Mom may be starting a dance with the disease early, well before she's conscious of its effects.
2. Parents don't want to admit that there may be "that kind of problem" at home because doing so will reflect badly on the image of their family. Shame is known as a most powerful force for a reason - it keeps things hidden from view.
3. The parent is inclined to make life easier for her addict in the mistaken belief that by making him more comfortable, somehow, he will change his ways, when the enabling just encourages his disease to take over.
4. At some point, the addict lost the power of choice, but that does not mean his behaviour is in any way excused. He needs always to be held accountable, as that is an essential part of de-enabling.
5. There is much hope for healing for the still-suffering loved one of an addict/alcoholic. We highly recommend you seek the freedom from a disease that you didn't ask for by trying the fellowship of Al-Anon where you will find love and understanding given to you by those who share your life story.