Clatterfart

Something Rhymes with Purple

It’s going to be an episode full of tittle-tattle today as Gyles and Susie sit down for a good gossip as we excavate the words and idioms associated with this favourite hobby.
We’ll have a good blather but stopping short of becoming a ‘blatherskite’ due to its distasteful meaning, we’ll bloviate at length with a certain ex-PM in mind as we uncover the links between this type of gossip and the stuffing in your clothes, before we discover that there are many origin stories for the phrase ‘Cock and Bull story’ that are unsurprisingly, cock-and-bull.
Recorded live at The Fortune Theatre, London on Sunday 19th February.
Susie’s Trio
Colporteur: A person who sells books and newspapers.
Potvaliance: The courage that only comes from alcohol
Cryptomnesia: When you forget something and then ‘discover’ it as a new and original thought.
GYLES POEM
ANON - Life Spans
The horse and mule live 30 years
And know nothing of wines and beers.
The goat and sheep at 20 die
And never taste of Scotch and Rye.
A cow drinks water by the ton,
And at 18 is mostly done.
The dog at 15 cashes in
Without the aid of rum and gin.
The cat in milk and water soaks
And then in 12 short years it croaks.
The modest, sober, bone-dry hen
Lays eggs for nogs, then dies at 10.
All animals are strictly dry
They sinless live and swiftly die.
But sinful, ginful, rum-soaked men
Survive for three score years and ten.
And some of them, a very few,
Stay pickled till they’re 92.

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