It's a barely-there morning episode to cover the barely-there Blues who dropped 3 league points and crashed out of the Open Cup this weekend. Miseries abound as we do our weekly David Lee grousing, but also evaluate first minutes for the awesome aussie Aidan O'Neill, talk about the mess caused by the Feet of Keat, final third piss-poor passing, and…

Three points against the FCC have Jake and Trey feeling like digital pirates! We're cruising down your broadband streams with a total recap of 90 minutes of play that were wetter than Ben Shapiro thinks is biologically possible, including Julian's early gamewinner, Alonso's crossbar crisis, Matt Freese's treats & tricks, tackling the tilt, and much…

With three points from across the border, NYCFC keeps finding just enough to live. Your boys in blue break down the election-weekend win in Canada, including a faceoff with club legend Sean Johnson, penalty provocations, back line legends, our May-December midfield, and much much more. Plus: it’s official, Aiden O’Neill busts our Aussie cherry. And…

Grim times at the Blue Balls HQ this week as Jake & Trey break down the 0-2 loss against New England's bottom-scraping Revolution. Morale is at an all time low, even as Moralez minutes are at an all-time high! We talk the return of Tayvon, a truly senseless Starting XI, the toothlessness of the attack, and log into the chat as Thiago Martins defend…

We're wringing out our souvenir hats and wiping our shoes on the 7 train as we recap some GOOD news at long last. A 1-0 win against Philadelphia had a redeeming effect on NYCFC's morale and your boys in blue are here to predict whether the weather will stay or pass. We map the midfield action from the Parks to the Shore, Martinez's massive mid-spee…

Your sleepy boys in blue shake the sand out of their eyes and talk Sunday afternoon's grim little outing against a visiting Minnesota. A 2-1 loss humbled our Boys in Blue and Jake & Trey will break it all down for you, including the a-Limits of Alonso, the cut-inside revival developing in the offense, the virtues and vices of 40th-minute subs, and …

It certainly was a game that happened, Blue Ballers. Jake and Trey take their reluctant seats to try and figure out what the fuck happened in the 3-4 loss to Atlanta’s Five Stripes that looked, for all intents and purposes, like a 3-1 victory was imminent. We talk direct action in the first 45, turning point moments, fault analysis, cool heads and …

Your boys in blue are back to break down a toothless away match against Columbus. We talk teenage wastelands, Freese finesse, Wolf woes, Bakrar PTSD, and much more. Plus, the griping continues with a less-than-inspiring performance from the supposedly ascendant USMNT in the Concacaf Nations, and Malachi Jones continues his slow mend. And: a cheekly…

Blue ballers, we're back and we're keeping it a buck reviewing our 3-goal, 2-1 victory over the Revs at Yankee Stadium. Jake & Trey talk the perennially underrated Keaton Parks, Martinez' most recent clinical finish in front of goal, the dawn (?) of Julian, and much more. Plus: vibe checks in the guts of Yankee Stadium, Outfield reports on a differ…

This was the day we truly became Season Eleven, Blue Ballers. Jake and Trey can't help themselves — your boys in blue devote the WHOLE episode to a man-by-man and play-by-play unpacking of the 2-1 victory over Orlando in NYCFC's tenth-anniversary home opener. It was a game of generations; we chat MOTM Johnny Shore's ascendance, the indispensability…

Are you having déjâ vu, Blue Ballers? A late-night last-minute goal stole points off NYCFC's plate and your boys Jake and Trey are here to recap it. We talk depth and DPs, Tayvon troubles, butterfly effects, min-maxing when we're missing Maxi, and much much more. Plus: week 2 MLS recaps, merch mishigas, and a blast from the past as we talk about th…

We're back, blue bitches, for Season Eleven! Jake and Trey, your boys in blue, are so excited to talk to you about NYCFC's season opener that we're pinching ourselves in the neck to make sure we're not dreaming! We break down every white-knuckled moment of NYCFC's draw against eleven ten of Miami's finest, including the cards that were and the card…

Y'all ready for season eleven? Your Boys in Blue are, and that's why they've given you a preseason double-size episode before the era of Jansen and the wide open mystery of NYCFC 2025 starts to reveal itself! Jake and Trey talk about the Saintis Marching Out, some preseason-based predictions, and of course a riotous round of over/under action, with…

Did you miss us, blue ballers? We've been storing up off-season news like nuts in a squirrel's cheeks, and we're finally ready to spill our delicious hoard out for all of you starving soccer fans. Jake & Trey break down the banner news: the hiring of Pascal Jansen as new NYCFC Top Dog. Will this dutchman fly us to victory? Or will we sink like so m…

Part 2 of 2! Jake and Trey rejoin to discuss senseless Superdraft suggestions, hot stove(r) hypotheticals, and of course to tally up the points from our top-of-season predictions to see who gets the coveted Chipotle Aluminum Wrap Trophy. Reminiscences on one of the weirdest seasons in club history abound. Whil out your scorecards: you’ve got Blue B…

Part 1 of 2! The cup is hoisted, the season’s over, and Jake and Trey are ready to reflect. We wipe the sand from our eyes and chat roster moves, expansion draft decisions, and of course the end of the tenure of 2021 veteran, controversial commander, and perennial promiser of better days: Tricky Nick Cushing. Plus: a little chatter about the incred…

We lost, you know what it is. Crack this one open if you're ready to process the end of a weird, weird season. Don't forget your SSRIs — you've got Blue Balls.

Blue Ballers, we didn't expect to be recording this episode but we're pleased as punch to be sharing it with you. Jake and Trey sit down to revel in the conquest of 3-seed FC Cincy and the ensuing derby day playoff at Citi Field against the New Jersey Red Bulls. We break down the extra-innings PK shootout against Cincy and all the hardcore defensiv…

Sharp-eared Blue Ballers will know: we never expected to be here after last week. But after a 3-1 victory over visiting Cincy, we've got ourselves a three-game series and the extra motivating factor of a cross-town rival in the postseason. Could NYCFC actually make it to the second round of playoffs? Or was the defensive devastation we saw on Satur…

Rough week for New York, Blue Ballers! Jake & Trey hop on the mic to break down one of the most disturbingly toothless performances by NYCFC in club history, in a moment which needed anything but. We talk Santi self-sabotage, Trayvon’s late-game drama, Cushing’s tactical malpractice, and more. Plus a little on the state of the league, the state of …

Blue ballers, a 0-2 loss against Montreal to drop your boys to 6th has Jake and Trey feeling restless. So we've got another short one that turned out to be a long one on our hands. Your boys in blue break down the disarray to pull some positives out and keep the faith; we talk offensive ineffectiveness and playing-up / playing-down action. THEN: Cu…

Ahoy Blue Ballers and welcome back to another edition of your least-favorite favorite soccer pod, and boy did we miss you. After a bye week for both the boys and pod boys, Jake and Trey dive into the last two games of the team's current mini-streak. We talk Santi and Alonso's white hot run, how NYCFC can (or can not) hold it together to end a match…

Sunnier skies for us, Blue Ballers! An explosive 5-1 victory against New Jersey’s not-quite-finest has Jake and Trey feeling cautiously optimistic about the end of NYCFC’s season. But have Cushing’s children found their form? Or did the adrenaline of a Hudson River sweep give us a power boost we’ll be paying for heading into the end of the 2024 sea…

Blue ballers! We’re coming off an EVENTFUL two matches and ready to piece it all apart. Your Boys in Blue were in the press box for both the historic inaugural 5-1 shellacking by Philadelphia AND the GOAT’s visit to Gotham and the single secured point of the week. Is a last minute equalizer from James Sands enough to buoy our spirits? Or is a conti…

Welp! It's another dropped-points-from-a-first-half-lead show! Hope you guys enjoy it! Jake & Trey talk disappointments in DC, then pivot to crest chat, club identity politics, stadium renderings, and of course the briefest of double precaps for two marquee matches at home. Call your girlfriend, it's time you had the talk: you've got Blue Balls!…

Blue Ballers, we're just as grouchy as you but the content mines need excavating and your Boys in Blue are here to break it all down for you. We talk: Fernandez getting fooled around with by an uncomfortably touchy Unkel, Barraza's big shoes to fill, overlaps, possession, and penetrating passes galore, and also all the bad stuff. Plus: a little ban…

Welcome back Blue Ballers, as we've missed you truly and dearly and need to catch up. Jake and Trey conquer a ticking computer battery time bomb to talk all things dog days of August. We first embark on the journey of this past weekend, gleaning the small, medium, and big picture takeaways from an epic Chicago collapse. Then, a Leagues Cup recap an…

Listen to this one quick, ballers, because your boys in blue are here to recap NYCFC's stint in the two-leg Leagues Cup group stage! Do we talk extensively about the 0-0 draw and the hair-raising penalty shootout that put us in the knockout round? Not at all! Instead we talk about what we can and can't learn from the bizarre and at turns brilliant …

Good tidings BBers. We're back in the saddle after a week off and how oh how are we gonna cover all these damn matches. Your boys in blue get into it on the Chicago, Atlanta, and Orlando draws, pulling noticeable performances out of each. We talk McFarlane's steady seventeen-year-old hand, the Santi-Maxi Paradoxi, and Talles Magno's sudden and oppo…

The dog days of summer are upon us, Blue Ballers, and this week in Austin we felt it! After an encouraging 2-0 victory over Montreal at home, your boys in blue were humbled by Austin FC and Gyasi Zardes. Jake and Trey break down all the eastern european reasons why that happened, plus the struggles we're enduring as our beat up boys nurse their wou…

Bonjour Blue Ballers, and welcome back to another (short) week of your silly boys making silly noise. Jake is sick and he's much better at writing these things than me, so we're Swede-ing this episode description. (Remember "Be Kind, Rewind"? A relic of another time to be sure). This week we talk New York City FC's thrilling, yet not always satiati…

From third to sixth, from winning streak to losing streak, from hot to cold, NYCFC are back to their old tricks of dropping points to the low block and pinging balls anywhere except on-target. Jake and Trey break down two more losses to Nashville and the LA Galaxy this week, what they tell us about the team's strategic woes, and what bright spots m…

A frustrating match that began with a rain delay and ended with a 1-goal deficit, and that's the end of our winning streak! Your boys in blue are back to break down each play in this match — but because we do them all 48 times, the episode is 37 hours long. Have fun! We talk the early Mit-jection, goals not-quite-disallowed, continued Maxi-mum bril…

Do we even need to introduce this week's pod? Jake & Trey bask in the glory of a five-one victory and the return of Maxi "Miles" Moralez, the spiderman himself, the min-maxed maestro, the five-foot nothing colossus. But outside of Maxi's 24 minutes of play, there's plenty else to break down and your boys cover a feckless first half of tactical adju…

Blue Ballers, it's been a hell of a May! Your Pigeons have been stacking up points and with three more in the pocket coming home from Massachusetts, there's a lot to celebrate and a lot to break down. Jake and Trey dig in to Big Bird's big score, NYCFC's rock solid centerbacks, Gray growth and gravitas, Gil-turns, and more. Then: casino drama at NY…

Buona Settimana blue ballers and what a settimana it has BEEN. Your boys in blue have come off a triumphant and historic 9 point week, finishing up with a win in the provincial first Hudson River Derby in Queens. We are ready to cover it all, and by "we" we mean half of us as Jake couldn't make it to this one. But FEAR NOT as we brought on noted tw…

Your boys in blue have a treat for you this week — Jake and Trey are joined by the illustrious DAN AVIDAN (Game Grumps, Ninja Sex Party) who flexes his bonafides as an OG fan of NYNJ soccer and a stalwart NYCFC supporter from season one. Your starstruck hosts cannot help but get into full-on interview mode with Dan, but worry not: the threesome als…