Poetry & Control

At Sea with Justin McRoberts

On most Sundays, I get the privilege of gathering in my house with a group of preteens and reading through bits of the scripture and talking about them. And then praying together, it's a thing we call the good news Club, which borrows from a tradition we've gleaned from. One of my favorite parts of these gatherings is that we don't just read from one translation of the Bible. We actually crack open three or four different translations and interpretations of the Bible and read the same story, the same text, and the same bid, including the Jesus storybook Bible and the message we read from the NIV. We have an NRSV. We have like a bunch of different texts and translations. And it's been a kick to pay attention to the ways these sometimes first-time Bible readers will notice the difference between word usages, that in this version of Mark, this person uses this word. And over here, they use this word. It's the same story, the same moment, different words.

The practice is less about developing a taste for or a particular preference for a specific translation. It's about language, and not only is it okay that there are different words used to describe the same thing, it's, in fact, necessary and important because the reality of God is bigger and broader than the language we use to describe it in the same way, that the language we use to describe and relate with one another, is smaller, and less nuanced, and less beautiful than the reality of one another. See, words don't define reality. They express and sometimes define our experiences of reality.

Which is part of why I'm spending the time I'm spending to chase down books and interview poets this season. Poetry, as a practice reading and writing, has the power to help loosen my grip on language.

And perhaps more importantly, it helps me loosen the grip I think I have through language on reality.

It brings me to this. See, in the past, I would get hung up on the words we use and the ways I thought that those words missed reality. I couldn't capture all of what I meant by Christian with the Word Christian. I couldn't capture all of what I meant by God with the Word of God. I couldn't capture all of what I meant in a word. And so I wanted to stop using certain words like the ones I just used. I didn't want to use the Word Christian anymore because I didn't want to get tangled up in what you might think I might mean when I used the word, and then that just got exhausting. So my emotional posture shifted, and I decided I would redeem words that meant something to me. And that process and effort also got exhausting.

So I've shifted again, and nowadays, I'm trying to be less of a word, cop, period, and just become a better poet.

Poetry disorients and then reorients me to the language I use and the language around me. And the most important part of that process is actually that disorientation, the work of detachment and detangling, not just from the words themselves, or even the meanings I've attached to those words, but detangling and detaching myself from the control I think I have over reality, by way of my words, and by way of the meanings I've invested in them. Back control keeps me from seeing you as you are as opposed to seeing you the way I've decided you are. And it keeps me from encountering God as opposed to the way I wish or want God to be.

And here, I think of a series of words that I found useful for detangling myself from words. God rid me of God, a prayer by Meister Eckhart.

See, I don't want to try to abandon the words I've learned to use, or I don't want to try to entirely revamp my vocabulary to be more open unstead. I want to let go have the grip I think I have on reality through the words. I use poetry as a practice moves me towards that open posture, to be more receptive as a human so that I can receive you as you are so that I can receive God as God is and know that my limited words can only point in the direction of the nuanced, complex and abundantly beautiful reality of you.

And if God,

words don't become less powerful, by way of the poetic practice or less meaningful, by way of poetic practice, no instead, through poetry, I develop a far deeper respect for language, so much so that I simply refuse to use words like a tool of control.

The poetic practice teaches me that words can be a way to say

there's more here than I could begin to even imagine pinning down what I'm about to say. But I hope that with these carefully chosen words, I might point you in the direction of the reality I've experienced, a reality well beyond my capability in word to control or even a name.

Links For Justin:

Coaching with Justin
Order In Rest - New Book of Poems

Order Sacred Strides

JustinMcRoberts.com

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