On this dig back into past Patreon episodes, Doug tries to understand why the characters are all wearing Halloween costumes to ring in the New Year, Jamie finds David Copperfield uncharismatic and simply creepy, and we both delight in the constant Barbara Walters 'soft focus' of all interior shots. Hop in bed with that corpse, put on the most terri…

On this Holiday Special dip into television, Doug relates most to the child who becomes despondent and embraces the sweet release of death when lost in a cave, Jamie is forced to examine her obsession with orphans as a child, and we both agree that perhaps this elderly man may not be the pest caregiver for this small child. Strap on your neon headb…

On the latest episode of the podcast, Jamie confuses Sudoku with Wordle, Doug somehow works Goodfellas reference and terrible Ray Liotta impression into a slasher movie, and we both agree that Cropsey should stop bathing in kerosene before bed each night. Be sure at camp to sign up for Raft Building 101, tune in for the latest episode of Tough Guy …

On this dig back into past Patreon episodes, Doug loves seeing the last gasps of once-famous actors in horror movies, Jamie sees the true horror of weight lifting, and we both are delightfully surprised by the 'reveal' in a horror film. Remove all loose clothing when repairing your motorcycle, after a tragedy be sure to get your family member the h…

On the latest episode of the podcast, Jamie just wants to take a few moments to 'Tickle the Monster', Doug's television really wants him to watch Juwanna Mann instead of Near Dark, and we both agree that there needs to be a new Vampire handbook or pamphlet printed much like the Handbook to the Recently Deceased in Beetlejuice. Take a moment to stop…

On this dig back into past Patreon episodes, Doug thinks the waterbed was only invented for sex, Jamie admits to watching The Real Housewives...ONLY WHEN SICK, and we both feel bad for the overweight actor who has to refer to himself as a 'water pig' more than once. Deliver lines as though you're a child learning to read, keep up with your pool cle…

On the latest episode of the podcast, Jamie's excitement about sharing a name with the film's lead is quickly destroyed, Doug advises all babysitters out there to never help bathe children over the age of ten, and we both agree that any mean red-haired children deserve to be fed to pit tollologs. Go on a fun run with your local elementary school te…

On this dig back into past Patreon episodes, Doug takes a break from the podcast to karate-kick his dog (joking), Jamie thinks that being submerged in mud in the humid Vietnamese jungle may actually be refreshing, and we both agree that this is a movie that caused us to swear off Chuck Norris films on this podcast. Cover yourself in worms, take a b…

On the latest episode of the podcast, Doug realizes that Bugs Bunny is the Chevy Chase of the cartoon rabbit community, Jamie assumes that people thought Doug was a little girl when he was younger, and we both get a little worked up over Jessica Rabbit. Try not to cry when Roger reads the will at the end of the movie, try not to cry when a cartoon …

On this dig back into past Patreon episodes, Doug agrees with Gary Busey's statement and says, yes, piss on the Yankees and piss on the Phillies, Jamie understands how some critter messing with your plants might take you away from a wrestling match that you're quite invested in, and we both get really hung up on the idea of 'Private Justice'. Strap…

Jamie was sad she couldn't make this episode and will be back next time but honestly, she dodged a real bullet here. On the latest episode of the podcast, Doug is very uncomfortable with the relationship between this young boy and older woman, Karl is very uncomfortable with the relationship between this young boy and elderly 'wizard', and we are b…

Audio quality warning: For some reason, this one's pretty bad. On this dig back into past Patreon episodes, Doug pitches a great movie title, Jamie doesn't quite understand how our lead could possibly have a music career, and we both have such a difficult time readying all the hand-written messages in this made-for-tv movie. Be very afraid of your …

On the latest episode of the podcast, Doug suggests fixing this movie simply by removing the entire plot, Jamie confuses Tom Arnold with Tom Collins, Arnold Palmer and the name of a hotel, and we are both wildly distracted by the giant lump on the side of Kevin Spacey's face throughout the film. Smear a bunch of yogurt on your face while showering,…

On this dig back into past Patreon episodes, Jamie kinda wants more screen time with Arnold in nothing but a black speedo, Doug is a bit confused by who exactly the main villain of the piece is, and we fall involve with the absolutely adorable montage to open the film. Best padlock your toolshed, steal the tiniest car you can find, and join us as w…

On the latest episode of the podcast, Doug can't wait till his wife leaves him and he can finally purchase a windmill house in the Hamptons, Jamie doesn't understand why anyone would go on Merv Griffin with Phil Donahue around, and we both wonder what it would be like if the film were updated with Mark Wahlberg in the role of the psychic. Purchase …

On this dig back into past Patreon episodes, Jamie realizes that Chewbacca's pretty much a dead-beat-dad, Doug admits that while he never wanted to know what the Wookie pornography delivery system is, he's glad he does now, and we adore the relationship between Chewie's wife and Ralph Kamden's best friend. Toss a storm trooper to his horrible death…

On the latest episode of the podcast, Doug wonders if Wendy's fries would cause an angel severe diarrhea, Jamie inadvertently stumbles into a porthole/portal to porn bit, and we both agree that Phoebe Cates and the man who plays her father may be the only reasons to take a look at this film. Bury that French accent in dolphin noises, chow down on a…

On this dig back into past Patreon episodes, Jamie lets it slip that she worked at Blockbuster (which is news to her cohost), Doug has a big issue with the wardrobe choices throughout, and we both are a bit creeped out by these dead-eyed red-headed twins. Lead your family sing along of Yackety Yak, get that bear some pants to cover his bare ass, an…

On the latest episode of the podcast, Doug obsesses with a character's extreme amount of body hair, Jamie begins to question everything she knows regarding golf-attire, and we both fall into a giggle fit when recounting a certain line delivered in this film. Crank up the volume on your 'work' boom box, dump that V8 all over your chest, and join us …

On this dig back into past Patreon episodes, we travel back to 2017 to an early subscriber-only episode. Jamie assumes Michelle Pfeiffer was still trying to figure this 'acting thing' out, Doug likes Robert Wuhl as much as the next guy but argues that he cannot carry any film, and we both are a bit confused by the adoration of 50s culture in the 19…

On the latest episode of the podcast, Doug realizes that he scheduled his colonoscopy on his 20th wedding anniversary (we wish this was a joke), Jamie recounts the time she told an Army recruiter that she couldn't serve due to being a 'delicate flower', and we embarrass ourselves when trying to discuss anything military-related. Change your hair co…

On this dig back into past Patreon episodes, we travel back to 2017 to our very first subscriber-only episode. Jamie is disgusted (appropriately) through the recording, Doug does some research on the actual age of the actress which makes this much worse, and we both are pretty sad this this is the first film we're covering with this wonderful cast.…

On the latest episode of the podcast, Doug sings the praises of the majority of the cast in this horrible movie, Jamie thinks she's watching a movie starring Connie Francis and Perry Mason, and we both marvel at the decision to allow Dan Akyroyd to do whatever voice work this is. Put on your loudest formal-wear, allow an unhinged laser to give you …

On this dig back into past Patreon episodes, we travel back to 2021 when we thought it might be fun to cover another David Lynch movie since we had such fun with Blue Velvet. What a mistake., Jamie tries to get her husband to explain any part of this movie...and he won't, Doug makes some bold statements about just how bad this film is when it's pro…

On the nine year anniversary of the podcast, Jamie argues that a big part of women's rights might just include 'butt stuff', Doug tells his 'Sade story', and we both show our ignorance by not knowing what a credenza is. Hog-tie your boss with a telephone cord, slap on that Colonel Sanders costume, and join us as we are overwhelmed with delight gett…