Grudges (Matthew 18:21-22)

Devos.HipHop

Brinson || Black Canvas

I grew up in the church, and I’d often hear people say, “There’s no hurt like a church hurt.” I was always confused by what people meant until it happened to me. At that moment I understood clearly. What is a “church hurt,” you ask? It’s when another Christian sins against or wrongs you in some way. Issues like this are what Brinson addresses in his song “Grudges.”

If you’ve been a Christian for any length of time, one thing you’ve learned is that Christians still sin. Yes, some have it more together than others, but none of us have reached sinless perfection. That means there will be times when we are wronged in some way. I know friends who worked at churches & moved on to other opportunities, only to have the people they worked with start talking behind their back soon after they had left. I know artists who were booked for shows by Christian organizations, only to get shortchanged upon arrival. The list goes on. Any of these situations is enough to make someone hold a grudge and turn their back on the church. Like Brinson says in his song, “In the streets I’d expect that, but we in the Kingdom so I reject that…” In other words, Christians ought to know and act better! Unfortunately that’s not always the case.

How should we respond when stuff like this happens to us? Our natural response can take many forms, whether it be holding a grudge, lashing out in anger, or repaying their evil with our own. Of course, none of these are the right response. When we respond in these ways we are not displaying God’s character. Sure, it’s okay to be angry when we’re wronged, but it shouldn’t cause us to sin, nor should it last longer than it absolutely needs to (Ephesians 4:26).

So, what is the right response? In a word: forgiveness. The religious teachers of Jesus’ day taught that you were generous in forgiving your brother’s offense up to three times in your life. After that, you would not be wrong in withholding your forgiveness. But, in Matthew 18:21-22, Jesus flips the script when he teaches that we must forgive to the extreme. Jesus gives us a number so high that we should lose count of how many times we’ve forgiven our brother.

Now, forgiveness does not mean we let people walk all over us. Proper boundaries are good and necessary. The point is that when an offense does happen, we respond with a heart of forgiveness, while not neglecting the accompanying consequences that may be included with our forgiveness. As Christians we should not hold grudges, especially against those we call brother or sister in the faith. Our response needs to be forgiveness, even when it’s difficult. That’s what Jesus would do! If God can send his son to die for his enemies & forgive their sins, we should be able to forgive others as well.

Dig Deeper

1. Read Matthew 18:15-20. The context of Jesus’ words on forgiveness comes on the heels of teaching on church discipline. According to this passage, how should you respond when your brother sins against you?
2. Read Matthew 6:14-15. Why is forgiveness such an important issue for Christians? What is the consequence for having an unforgiving heart?
3. Read Colossians 3:13. It’s not always easy to forgive, but what does this verse teach us about why we need to forgive willingly?

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Background music: r&R “Life, Love & the Pursuit of… (Instrumental)” from album Travis Harmon & Jon Corbin are… r&R – courtesy of Jon Corbin