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Boarding School & "I've Got To Be Liked" | People Pleaser | Complier | Piers Cross
Manage episode 422097685 series 3438909
In today's video I talk about how important it was for us to be liked at boarding school.
If we weren't liked, we were often sent to coventry. We were banished.
Richard Beard in his book Sad Little Men, talks about how on any given year group there was alway one 'custos' - the outcast.
If you couldn't see the 'custos' then it was you.
I talk about compliers and people pleasers.
And how dangerous it was not to be liked at boarding school.
We couldn't just go home at the end of the day. If we weren't liked it followed us everywhere.
I talk about how controlling we can become as adults, following the rules that we learned at school.
If we are in politics or the bar or the corporate this often works as these systems were modelled on the boarding school world.
But in family life this can cause chaos.
I talk about what you can do to heal this.
Take care,
Piers
To support the new film: https://www.piers-cross.com/boarding-school-film
For the last podcast #96 about Trauma and Illness and the path to recovery: https://youtu.be/Uda5CTZTn1Q
---
Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.
He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.
He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1
For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross
For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic
For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community
Many blessings,
Piers Cross
http://piers-cross.com/
170 tập
Manage episode 422097685 series 3438909
In today's video I talk about how important it was for us to be liked at boarding school.
If we weren't liked, we were often sent to coventry. We were banished.
Richard Beard in his book Sad Little Men, talks about how on any given year group there was alway one 'custos' - the outcast.
If you couldn't see the 'custos' then it was you.
I talk about compliers and people pleasers.
And how dangerous it was not to be liked at boarding school.
We couldn't just go home at the end of the day. If we weren't liked it followed us everywhere.
I talk about how controlling we can become as adults, following the rules that we learned at school.
If we are in politics or the bar or the corporate this often works as these systems were modelled on the boarding school world.
But in family life this can cause chaos.
I talk about what you can do to heal this.
Take care,
Piers
To support the new film: https://www.piers-cross.com/boarding-school-film
For the last podcast #96 about Trauma and Illness and the path to recovery: https://youtu.be/Uda5CTZTn1Q
---
Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.
He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.
He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1
For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross
For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic
For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community
Many blessings,
Piers Cross
http://piers-cross.com/
170 tập
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