109. Sitting with Discomfort: Building Emotional Resilience And Problem-Solving Skills in Teens and Parents

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling Teen Before, During and After Treatment

We are all wired to avoid uncomfortable feelings. We instinctively shy away from discomfort, parents and teens alike. Whether it’s solving a problem for our kids, distracting ourselves from uncomfortable feelings, or we’re trying to save the day, we often act to avoid the tension. But here’s the hard truth: our teens need to experience that discomfort in order to grow. In this episode, Seth and I explore why learning to sit with emotional unease, both for ourselves and our teens or young adults, is key to developing resilience and problem-solving skills.

As parents, it’s all too easy to step in and “rescue” our kids when they’re struggling. But where’s the line between helping and enabling? Is stepping in actually saving them from distress, or is it preventing them from learning how to handle their own emotions? I share a story from one of my clients about how a teen’s persistent pushback led the parent to second-guess their boundaries, ultimately giving in to avoid discomfort. It’s a common trap, but real growth happens when we, as parents, can sit with that unease a little longer than our kids, helping them build the skills they need to handle life’s emotional challenges.

In this episode on learning to sit with discomfort, we explore:

• How long can you tolerate emotional discomfort before feeling the need to act?;
• The fine line between helping and enabling your child;
• Why sitting with your own distress can help your child develop problem-solving skills;
• The importance of modeling emotional resilience for your kids;
• How to balance support and structure when parenting teens.

Listen now to learn how to help your teen build emotional resilience and problem-solving skills by managing your own discomfort first!

Need support?
🗺️Need help setting healthy boundaries with your teen AND following through? My free guide will help you do so by creating your own Parent Home Plan!

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And remember parents, the change begins with us.

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